The plight of the control freak

Some of you might think that control freaks have the option of turning it off – but if you are one, you know it’s not true.  It’s like having middle child syndrome.  You can’t turn that crazy crap off, either.  And, if you got both – you are extra awesome!  Oh yeah.

So let’s look at some traits of the classic control freak.  And I can tease because I am one.

The Classic Control Freak:

  • Needs control the same way Linus needs his security blanket.
  • “Don’t touch my blanket, bitch!  No, I don’t need it.  I just like it!”
  • Will never admit that they are a control freak.
  • Unless you poke them a whole lot.  They HATE being poked.  Then they think the following…
  • Everyone is stupid.
  • (You poked her, didn’t you?  NEVER poke a control freak.  They bite.)
  • Yes, control freaks think everyone is stupid.
  • Except for you – who seems to be smart.
  • For now…
  • And, control freaks won’t ask you to do stuff, cause we can do it better…
  • Then we’ll bitch that we have to do everything ourselves…
  • Even though you offered to help and did an okay job…
  • Okay, it was a good job, but they won’t notice until later…
  • When we are obsessed with doing something else that doesn’t matter.
  • Then you give us a tee shirt that says BEWARE! WILL BITE!
  • We laugh, but we are really thinking you are stupid.

Ha ha ha!  🙂


About HM Ward

New York Times, Wall Street Journal, & USA Today bestselling author.
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One Response to The plight of the control freak

  1. Taylor Gentry says:

    I am exactly like this!!! hahahahaha! great description of a control freak!

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